How do I even begin to describe the anger I felt towards this certain person. I can't quite imagine that I was able to hold my temper all throughout the day. I felt so disappointed -_- I'm always straight-forward and I know that I can be harsh sometimes but I'd rather be that person whom everybody hates or avoids than be someone who enjoys backbiting others and pretend like nothing happened. Saying things without thinking sometimes is, I must say, ONE of my weaknesses. Sometimes thoughts that should stay in my head accidentally escapes and before I know it, I just blurted out everything and then thats when I realized that I fucked up. Oh well, being fucked up is part of growing up and I've always believed that through the mistakes we made thats how we can learn best. Going back, this afternoon we're supposed to go on a team-building but due to uncontrolled circumstances we decided to cancel it and before we did, we had to undergo a series of argumentation which I find very very very useless. If listening is so easy then why do we have to learn it? Simple, because its always a battle between deciding whether to listen or not. Most often, we don't intend to listen because we are afraid to realize that we made a mistake or maybe because there's too much pride in our system and that'll hurt our egos if we do. One thing that I kept on repeating during the argument is that you can't please everybody and not everything is all about you. Sometimes or even most of the time, we have to listen and understand what the others are trying to say rather than just listen to what we want to hear. Its never that way. Ever. And sometimes things will not go the way you wanted or planned it to be and you just have to accept that because that's life. If you keep on pushing and pushing something, you'll end up with bad fights and decisions that'll eventually make you feel alone and rejected and then, only then will you realize the real value of listening. Even God patiently listens to our prayers but how come some people just can't do it? Anywho, the conflict was somehow resolved but I'll just be keeping my guard up and expect the worst in the months to come. -_-
On a side note, I'm just happy I can stay at home tonight and lavish the cold weather. *u* I'm gonna be curling up on my sheets and pillow and watch Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Might do a review after. Teeheee. :D

Labels: arguments, conflicts, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, listen